New year, new feature here at The Last Movie Outpost.

Movie fans, eh?  Basically we are the worst.  We are like the sports fan who screams at players on the TV and half expects the coach to ring at any moment to ask our advice in a crisis, all the while getting out of breath to get up and go to the icebox for another beer.

The armchair Generals, too fat and cowardly to pick up a rifle and serve but always full of plenty of advice to anyone who will listen on how we would fight a war.

We snipe, we criticise, and we denigrate, but very few of us have actually made a movie, written a screenplay or even an outline.  At The Last Movie Outpost we dare each other to do better.

So we will.  Fantasy Film-making.  But hold on a second.  Just like Fantasy Football, it has some rules.  Where would we be without rules?  Fan wank and shipping, that’s where! Or possibly feeling uncomfortable in a hotel room on the Miramax account after an awards show.

What Can’t We Do?

Mainly, you have to play with the cards you have been dealt.  For instance, if you are “fixing” a sequel you have to start where the previous movie left you.  You can’t go back and retcon it out of existence, or merely ignore it because you didn’t like it.

Similarly, if the universe has already been established then you have to play within its rules.  No randomly invented superpowers to fill a plothole.  Same with characters and their motivations.  Unless you can make a workable narrative for them.

Finally, if the train is already in motion then you can’t recast simply because you didn’t like the original choice.  Proceed as if you are a jobbing writer/director.

Basically color within the lines, OK?

What Can We Do?

Anything goes, really.  We will write our own version of a “fixed” movie and you guys can critique it, suggest changes, rip it apart.  You can write your own.

Write an outline.  Write a scriptment.  Write a full screenplay if you have the desire.  Don’t like the poster, but you are a bit of a graphic artist?  Redesign it and share it below.  Create storyboards or animatics if you want.  Sketch away.

A musician with ideas of grandeur to improve the score?  Then whip out your Moog and give us an idea.

Anything really does go.  Once and for all we will prove that a bunch of geeks on the internet really, truly can do this shit better than the no-marks who seem intent on wrecking everything in Hollywood.

For years we have all come up with better ideas in our heads, in our conversations at the bar with friends, while geeking out on the internet.  This is where we put it all in one place and prove it.

Want to suggest movies for a future column to fix?  Want to write the first fix yourself? Shout out below and we will see what we can do.

This time around we fix one of the most divisive movies of recent years, one that gets fans everywhere excited, angry and combative.  The movie that divided critics completely from fandom and is widely credited with breaking Star Wars.

The Last Movie Outpost Fixes…  The Last Jedi

New opening crawl:

“Having struck a mortal blow against the New Republic, the First Order has also suffered a crushing defeat with the loss of Starkiller Base.

The Resistance has been betrayed by a spy in its midst and remnants of The First Order fleet prepare for revenge by striking their secret base.

As the New Republic scrambles what is left of its once mighty armada to assist the Resistance, a small band of Resistance fighters have raced to locate Luke Skywalker, seeking his help in the battles to come…”

Pan down to Ach-To, and start here rather than with the attack on the Resistance base. Rey hands Luke the Lightsaber as he looks at her, quizzically.

He asks her what she wants and where she got the lightsaber from.  She tells him she was with Han on Takodana when she found it.  At the mention of his best friends name, Luke visibly softens and asks where Han is, forcing Rey to tell him what happened.

The moment he hears it was Kylo Ren, a look of anger crosses Luke’s face, total rage is clear in his eyes as he grips the lightsaber tightly.  Then, just like that, it’s gone.  Looking mournfully down at his old lightsaber in his mechanical hand, he walks back to the edge of the cliff past Rey and looks down at the Falcon, catching sight of Chewie and Artoo.

He smiles ruefully as he turns back to Rey and says:

“I am afraid I may no longer be the man you think I am.”

End of scene.

So this establishes that Luke has changed and that something has happened to cause an internal struggle, without ridiculous, grumpy old man grunting and overdramatic lightsaber tosses to allow for Porg based comedy.

It is the start of Luke’s journey in this story and lays out Rey’s challenges for the film directly from this – connect with Luke, get Luke to train her, find out why Luke is having this crisis of faith and ability, and finally help reconnect Luke with who he was.  Simple. Straightforward.  No space hobo shenanigans required.

For us, the audience, our journey will be to follow Luke as he reveals what happened to make him have the crisis of faith, as he directly faces the challenge of training a new student (and why this is a challenge, more on that later) and the reason for his seclusion on the island.

The secondary story will be the Resistance escape.

Cut To:

D’Qar as the Resistance hastily evacuates.  Lines of expositionary dialogue here revealing that somebody must have betrayed them and wondering if what is left of the New Republic Fleet will get here in time to help them.  Rendezvous plans are revealed, as are efforts to destroy sensitive intelligence including their copy of the map to Luke Skywalker stored in the base computer.

Cut Back To Ach-To:

By cutting like this we are trying to fix some of The Last Jedi’s, and indeed all of the sequel trilogy’s, problematic issues regarding the passage of time and distance.

Everything happens instantly in The Last Jedi as it stands.  It makes the galaxy feel tiny. People hop around pointlessly and complete long journeys in what seems like moments. This makes the whole thing feels like it takes place in the galactic equivalent of one city block, over a long weekend.

Now the Resistance knows the First Order is coming.  The Order does not, however, turn up on their doorstep in full battle armada mode mere moments after losing huge swathes of its forces in the destruction of Starkiller base.  It takes them time to pull a fleet together, and time to travel across the galaxy to where their spy has told them the Resistance is based, just as it takes time for the Resistance to pack.

The ridiculousness of the entire New Republic and their fleet being wiped out in a single shot is removed.  It’s been hit hard, it’s on the ropes, but a pan-galactic administration isn’t destroyed in a single moment.  Parts are still functioning.

In this vein, when we return to Ach-To, the scene starts halfway through a conversation over a meal.  Again, some time has clearly passed.  Luke, Rey, and Chewie are eating and talking like real, functioning adults rather than pastiches.  Artoo is there and involved.  Luke almost looks happy.

He is asking questions about the Resistance, the Republic, and the First Order.  This allows for some exposition to be included, rather than buried in endless novels and comics that leave the causal observer sitting in a theatre wondering what they missed.

Rey highlights the struggles the galaxy will face now that the New Republic has been so damaged and calls out that the Resistance could be all that can stop the First Order, which is why Leia needs his help.  He repeats that he is not the man they think he is and that he can’t (won’t) leave the island.

Rey asks him if he won’t fight himself, can he train her to help Leia.  Luke declines, stating he tried being a Master twice before.  Once with Leia, and once when things didn’t go too well.  The darkness in his eyes again.  Then he rapidly changes the subject.

Cut To D’Qar:

The arrival of the First Order Fleet just as the evacuation is completing.

By switching this around we have only taken ten minutes of run time, fifteen maximum. However, by this point, we have established a sense of distance and time and built some tension as we have known this battle is approaching.  We have done this but also laid out the characters, placed them where they need to be, and given them their challenges and motivations.

In this battle, there is no need for a “Yo Mama” joke in space, inexplicably slow bombers, gravity bombs in zero gravity, and comedy electricity behaving like water.  What we have is a desperate fight led by Poe Dameron to prevent the First Order from reaching the Resistance ships trying to complete the evacuation.  Meanwhile, on the surface, there is a race against time to corrupt the map to Skywalker before the First Order ground troops arrive.

As all seems lost, the remnants of the New Republic armada arrive and help the Resistance escape.  First Order ground troops find the console with the map to Skywalker in the wreckage of the hastily evacuated base, but the data is almost hopelessly corrupted.

Now, a few key changes come with this sequence.

The leader of the New Republic remnant fleet is Admiral Holdo.  So she is not some random, but completely unknown before now, some senior commander the Resistance magically happened to have just sitting about until when needed.

Holdo considers herself the military leader, and the Resistance nothing more than guerillas.  This immediately creates tension with Leia and in the combined fleet.  These tensions are deflected toward Poe, who is obviously loyal to Leia.  So they are believable tensions with a reason for existing.  This is unlike what The Last Jedi originally tried, which came across more like:

”Keep the crazy Space Mexican out of the loop and let the white women handle this!”

This will also allow us to expand the information to explain, as Rey will have touched on in her summary on Ach-To, as to who the Resistance is? Why they existed within the New Republic?  Why the Republic didn’t listen to the Resistance warning them about the rising First Order.  All the good detail Lucasfilm inexplicably buried in collateral outside of the movies in one of the stupidest decisions in a long line of truly baffling plays.

As these tensions are growing, the First Order fleet arrives, inexplicably knowing exactly where they had jumped to.  During this unexpected attack, Leia is injured.  No magic Mary Poppins Force Leia in a vacuum oddity (insanity) here.  In our fixed version, Leia senses what is about to happen with her often hinted at Force ability, and as the back of the bridge is blown out, she instinctively, and at the speed of thought, force pushes machinery to plug the gap and slow decompression as she is sucked across the bridge into the machinery.

Admiral Ackbar survives and is the one who activates the force field, ultimately saving them, before ordering the fleet to hyperspace again before finally succumbing to his injuries. His last act was to save the ship and then the fleet instead of going out off-screen and barely acknowledged – thanks Rian Johnson!

Leia unconscious and Ackbar dead leaves Poe leading the Resistance, at loggerheads with Holdo on how to respond.  Every time they drop out of hyperspace the Order arrives a short time afterward.  This leads Poe to believe that whoever the spy was that revealed the location of their base is still among the fleet, transmitting their locations after hyperspace jumps are completed.

This is where Finn and Rose get their side mission.  Finn knows First Order procedures, Rose knows the fleet and engineering.  Together they must hunt the spy and can only move from ship to ship in the fleet as they follow clues after hyperspace jumps, and before the Order show up forcing the fleet to jump again.  This provides a sense of urgency and a sequence of a ship to ship transfer between jumps with a ticking clock before the Order arrives.

This completely removes the implausible Deux ex Machina of the hyperspace tracking system.  It exorcises the Keystone Cops comedy-style chase where ships miraculously move at the same speed as each other, just out of range, until a commodity never before mentioned in the history of Star Wars – Hyperfuel – runs out simply because it’s in the script.

More importantly, it renders the painful side trip to Canto Bight totally un-needed.  No heavy-handed environmental and anti-capitalist lessons here while cavorting with space donkeys and broom boys.

Just some in-fleet espionage with uneasy allies at each other throats, exacerbated by concerns about a betrayer in their midst.  This tension is ratcheted up by the predator vs. prey, relentless pursuit of the First Order.

This plays out, in old fashioned Star Wars style, while intercutting with the story back on Ach-To and the efforts within the First Order fleet to rebuild the map to Skywalker from the wrecked Resistance computer bank.

Back On Ach-To:

Cutting in and out from the above storyline we see Rey still attempting to self-train. However, Luke is not totally stand-offish and moves from dropping small hints and tips e.g. about improving lightsaber stances, deeper concentration, etc. to actually teaching as she breaks down his resistance and he begins to rediscover himself through teaching.

As this happens, he reveals slowly and in parts, the story of his successful training of Leia in a few core Force skills, his establishment of a new Jedi Temple and his best student, his own nephew Ben.  However, like a typical Jedi, he is clearly not telling Rey everything and his story could perhaps only be fully true “from a certain point of view.”  No multi-viewpoint flashbacks here.  Just proper Star Wars storytelling.

As this happens, he, in turn, becomes fascinated with Rey.  Who is this girl?  Why does she have such natural ability?  He knows where his came from.  His father was the greatest Jedi who ever lived, who eventually became the most feared man in the galaxy.  Is he doing the right thing in training this girl without understanding her history?  He seeks answers in meditation and in communion with Yoda.  They both sense something in her.

We don’t need X-treme spearfishing and lactating space cows to tell our story, because we aren’t fucking idiots.  Luke has a journey, Rey actually trains and learns.  Time passes.

Meanwhile, Back In The Fleet:

The net closes on the spy.  A trap is set using Holdo as bait.  It almost fails and Holdo is critically injured during the capture of the spy.  The spy turns out to be a New Republic senator hoping to curry favor with Snoke as he knows the New Republic is lost. The spy had secure communication with Snoke all along.  We also learn Snoke was a fellow New Republic senator, who was seduced by the dark side and used his power and influence to begin to rebuild what he became convinced was a glorious Empire.  Was he guided by somebody? Assisted?  Mentored?

Through an awake Leia, we learn that Snoke’s spy was the main voice in the New Republic senate running interference against the Resistance, bad-mouthing Leia and covering for the First Order.  He was instrumental in downplaying their power and influence, hence their hidden threat in The Force Awakens and the cause of the schism between Leia with the Resistance and the New Republic.  Also why elements of the New Republic were covertly helping the Resistance, including the Republic Armada protecting them as Threepio said in The Force Awakens.

Furthermore, we learn, from Leia’s point of view, about what happened between Luke and Ben Solo.  Likewise back on Ach-To, Luke has gradually revealed more, but not the whole story or why he refuses to leave.

On Snoke’s command ship they have defrag’d the map.  Snoke dispatches Kylo and a small force, including the Knights Of Ren, to eliminate Skywalker and the girl, of whom both Ren and Snoke have been having visions.  They understand she will be a threat.  No Force FaceTime Plotski bullshittery here.  Before he leaves, Snoke confides something in Kylo but we don’t know what it is… yet.

With the pursuing First Order force splitting and reducing as Kylo takes a force to follow the map to Skywalker Poe, Leia, and a critically injured Holdo, decide they have to make a stand.  They have been running for months.  Sometimes the Order shows up within hours, sometimes after a couple of days, but they always show up and the Republic/Resistance cannot continue like this.

Both sides take losses in a huge battle, but the Order is on the verge of winning when a fading Holdo orders her skeleton crew to evacuate without her.  She explains that the navi-computer will always try and avoid obstacles at lightspeed – it’s the reason for it existing, as explained by Han all the way back in A New Hope.  Therefore the ship needs a manual pilot.  It can’t be a droid as they are programmed to preserve the ship and they don’t have time to reprogramme a droid.  And for what she has in mind they need mass, so it has to be a capital ship, not a snub fighter.

As she is dying anyway, she makes the ultimate sacrifice in performing the Holdo manoeuvre and saves the survivors from both the New Republic and the Resistance.  There you go JJ / Rian – a reason why the Holdo manoeuvre was a limited opportunity.  You dolts!

Snoke dies as his ship is destroyed along with the bulk of his fleet.  What is left flees after Kylo.

Leia orders the fleet to head to Crait where a long-abandoned and secret old Rebel base and weapons store is hidden.  Upon arrival they begin to make it their new home and try to gather whatever is left of the New Republic to their position.

Back To Ach-To:

Luke and Rey are in the middle of an advanced lightsaber training session, showing how far Rey has come and how Luke is revelling in rediscovering his role as a Master.  She is very mobile, and fast, showing incredible dexterity with the blade.  Luke is blocking with ease, using the force to place more obstacles in her way or give her additional targets.

The scene shows how she has trained, she has learned, she has grown, but she is still very much his student.  He clearly has incredible power and skill without overtly showing it as he remains Zen-like, making it look easy.  Chewie and Artoo are looking on and clearly approve.

As the session finishes, they rejoin Chewie and Artoo.  Artoo beeps happily as Luke places his robotic hand on Artoo’s dome.  Chewie playfully ruffles Rey’s hair.  It’s a reminder of a past time, a happy time.

Suddenly Artoo starts to become agitated.  His sensors have detected something approaching, a ship.  Luke tells Rey, Chewie, and Artoo to get back to the Falcon.  He starts to climb up the path back to the summit where Rey originally found him as a First Order shuttle comes into view.

Rey begs to stay with him and help him fight whatever is coming.  Luke stops, closes his eyes, senses everything around him and tells her:

”No, you are not ready for this.  Go with Chewie, he will keep you safe.”

She refuses, Luke insists, Chewie barks and takes her hand, pulling her away as Artoo leads the way.  Luke stalks up the hill towards the landing First Order shuttle.  He stands and waits as the ramp comes down.  Kylo emerges, flanked by the Knights Of Ren.  He stares at Luke:

”Coward!  In hiding all this time.”

And now, as part of this exchange, we learn the truth.  The reason Luke is on the island, the reason he wouldn’t leave, why he didn’t want to train another apprentice.

When Kylo turned, betrayed him, killed his students and burned the Temple, Luke wasn’t there, he was elsewhere with Leia and Han doing some New Republic business when their only son destroyed everything.

When Luke found out what Ben had done he felt the dark side of the force calling out to him in a way he never had before, even on the Death Star, when he faced Emperor Palpatine.  Anger, rage, hatred flowing through him, empowering him, demanding action, revenge, and offering him limitless power in return.  He let it consume him for a moment and enjoyed it.

Kylo Ren thinks he knows the dark side?  Luke laughs in his face.  He has forgotten more about the dark side than this child will ever know.  Now we see the anger and darkness across Luke’s face, and the hatred burning in his eyes.

He’s not on Ach-To because he’s scared of Kylo Ren and hiding from him.  He’s there because he knew what he may do if he ever saw him again.  Now Kylo has sought him out, and all bets are off.

This is full power Luke, what we have been waiting 30 years to see.  He is The Last Jedi and now all hell breaks loose.  He just wades through the Knights Of Ren as if they aren’t even there.  One is force thrown aside with just a flick of a hand.  Another is hurled through the door of an Ach-To hut, which is then crushed inward on him with a squeeze of a fist.

The others are just on the receiving end of an almighty whooping by Luke showing off lightsaber skills the likes of which we have never seen.

As quickly as it begins, it is over with Luke striding towards Kylo.  Kylo tries desperately to defend himself but Luke just swats his lightsaber aside then rails on him.  Kylo’s saber is in a defensive position, he is pushed to his knees and Luke chops at him, again and again and again, with power and ferocity.  Raining blows against his desperate defence, reminiscent of Luke chopping at Vader as if he’s a tent-peg being hammered into the ground in the Throne Room of the Death Star II all those years ago.

With a final swipe, the lightsaber goes tumbling from Kylo’s grip and he is on his knees in front of Skywalker.  Skywalker raises his lightsabre over his head.

He’s going to do it.  He’s going to kill Kylo Ren, his nephew, the son, and the murderer, of his best friend.  You can see the rage in his eyes, and darkness on his face, as he prepares to strike.

Then he stops.  He lowers his lightsaber, and we see calmness return to his face once more, the hate in his eyes gone.  He has calmed his anger, mastered the dark side, been able to tap into it at will then switch it off as he wishes.

He just turns and walks away from the beaten, pathetic figure of Ren who is still on his knees.  As he moves away Kylo sees his chance.  Summoning his lightsaber from across the clearing he ignites it and is about to try and attack Luke from behind.

With the flick of his hand back over his shoulder  (as if swatting a fly) Luke sends Kylo force thrown through the air and back up the hill the fifty yards or so to his own shuttle, up the ramp with such force that he slams into the bulkhead at the back of the hold.  A naughty child being effortlessly sent to his room by a parent, almost comically.  Such is Luke’s power now.

Kylo, in one of his tantrums, tells his fleet to begin aerial bombardment as his shuttle lifts off.  As Luke is watching him go he hears cracks like lightning coming from the sky and suddenly we see the red streaks of the aerial bombardment emerge from the clouds and start to slam into the ground around him with terrifying ferocity.

He begins to run and more shots reign down leaving great smoking craters in the ground. Suddenly we see the Falcon with Chewie at the controls weaving this way and that way through the bombardment as it streaks to the ground, the ace Wookie pilot at ease in his ship.

As the Falcon reaches Luke it pivots and turns and we see the side ramp is down and there is Rey waiting for Luke with her hand outstretched.  Luke leaps just as an energy bolt obliterates the ground where he was standing, and Rey catches his arm as he makes it to the ramp which we see Artoo, plugged into a wall socket nearby, close with them still on it as the Falcon climbs away from the carnage and streaks into space.

In orbit, we see Kylo’s reduced fleet and as Ren’s shuttle is docking, the Falcon streaks up from the surface and jumps to lightspeed before they can react.

Onboard the Falcon at lightspeed, we have some dialogue outlining that they have to try and contact Leia, and with no idea where the fleet is, knowing it will be some time before they are far enough in from the outer rim to start sending coded messages.  In the meantime, Luke continues with Rey’s training, and we see a familiar blast shield helmet and training drone.

Onboard the First Order fleet, we see Kylo receiving the news about Snoke and going off to communicate with somebody.  What did Snoke whisper to him before they parted ways?

Back On Crait:

The base is being established, again pointing to the passage of time.  A collection of vintage rebel tech sits alongside more modern Resistance and New Republic equipment. Leia gets a fragment of a message on an old Rebel emergency frequency, news that the Falcon is on its way back and trying to find the Resistance.  Leia risks a transmission with its location.

This is what is picked up by First Order informers, rather than a comedy shuttle running away scene with cloaking technology, again hitherto unseen in the Star Wars universe, and invented out of thin air to paper over a crack in the plot!

So it’s a race to Crait between the Falcon and the First Order. Won by the First Order as they were closer.  When Ren’s fleet arrives, it is a much more even fight as the First Order has been depleted even further by the Holdo Manouvere and the Resistance augmented with New Republic remnants.  Old Hoth styled snowspeeders fight alongside both vintage and brand new ground vehicles, with Stormtroopers and Rebel troops engaged in direct action while TIE and X-Wing / Y-Wing / A-Wing battle for aerial supremacy.

All in all, the Battle Of Crait is a major sequence, rather than the frustrating after-thought presented in The Last Jedi.

Heavy losses on both sides, and eventually the more ruthless approach of the First Order and their powerful, more modern equipment forces the Resistance back to the base.

While they prepare to retreat, hoping the shield door holds, the Falcon arrives and we get to see Luke face down the First Order’s ground forces.  The images are of a lone Jedi Knight standing on the battlefield, facing an array of battered stormtroopers, battle-damaged imperial speeders and and their remaining walkers.

It is tempting to envisage, at this point, full-power Jedi Luke going to town on the First Order.  A super-human cutting a swathe through ranks of Stormtroopers, force pulling TIE fighters out of the sky, toppling walkers with a casual thought and wave of the hand.

However you can’t really do that for two main reasons:

1) You make Luke a cold-blooded killer.

2) You have then written yourself into a narrative cul-de-sac whereby a superhero, Godlike character has rendered all future battles to come in this series as meaningless because they can single handily wipe out an entire army.

So now we have to show restraint, as does Luke.  He calls out Kylo Ren directly.  Ren doesn’t want to go as he is actually scared of Luke.  Like all spoilt, special children the first time somebody said “No” to him, like Luke so emphatically did at the end of the last act, has left him damaged.

He orders his men to fire.  A squad of stormtroopers takes aim and fires.  We see Luke do the same trick Kylo did to freeze a blaster bolt in The Force Awakens but on a grander scale vs. fifty blasters.  He then calmly sidesteps and unfreezes them to fly harmlessly past him.

Hux is pushing Kylo’s buttons now, sensing Kylo maybe does not want to face Skywalker. Kylo is getting increasingly agitated and orders some TIE fighters to strafe Luke.

Luke ignites his lightsaber and deflects those heavier blaster bolts as the run has no effect.

All the while he is demanding Ren come out and face him, and Hux is pushing Kylo.  Kylo erupts in rage and force chokes Hux momentarily before dropping him gasping on the floor and stalking out of his command ship toward Luke.  He is visibly shaken and fearful after what happened last time.

So the final duel begins.  But this time it is very different.  There is no rage or darkness in Luke’s face.  No hatred in his eyes this time.  He is calm, Zen-like.  He barely lays a saber on Ren, but quite deliberately.  Instead, he spins, blocks, pivots.  It’s ballet.  Classic fencing.  Supreme defence.  Kylo cannot get near him as he dodges and weaves and parries.

Kylo is getting increasingly angry and frustrated.  This is made even worse when Luke starts mocking him for his beliefs and chosen path.

Eventually, after failing to strike Luke for the entirety of the duel, Kylo retreats, putting some distance between himself and Luke, he orders his walkers to fire all weapons at Skywalker.  As the bolts reign down and kick up clouds of dust, smoke, and debris we can just about see Luke through the carnage blocking some bolts with his lightsaber.  Enough to keep him safe but clearly taking a lot of effort and forcing him backwards.

As the smoke clears from the barrage, we see Luke emerge.  No smug wink at the audience or dusting off his shoulder here.  This has clearly taken a lot out of him.  Kylo gives the order:

”Hit him again!”

The barrage begins again, again Luke deflects with his frantic lightsaber defence being visible through the smoke and debris.  Again he is forced back.  This time, as the smoke clears, we can see he is on his knees.  He wearily gets to his feet.

Just as Kylo is about to give the order to fire again, Hux interrupts him with the news that their sensors are showing a large number of ships lifting off from beyond the shield wall. The whole thing has been a giant distraction to give the Resistance time to escape.

While Hux and Ren argue, a small speeder darts out of Resistance base towards Luke, piloted by Finn to collect Luke.  A couple of TIE fighters give chase as they race towards a rendezvous.  They are beaten back by the timely arrival of the Falcon.

Leia and Rey are onboard with Chewie.  We get another moment between a very much alive and present Luke Skywalker and Leia.  Leia gets to give her speech about having everything they need.  The Falcon and the remnants of their fleet jump to light speed away from the First Order.

The End

Hopefully, we have fixed some of the glaring issues with The Last Jedi as presented in cinemas by:

  • Giving Luke an arc and a journey without making him totally betray his own character.
  • Giving Rey some training and made her have to work to acquire new skills rather than them being granted to her with no effort on her part.
  • Giving Luke the opportunity to show off his fully developed skills and power, but not had him go out like a fool giving himself a stroke while using Force FaceTime.
  • Leaving him alive and giving him time with Leia.
  • On that subject, we got rid of the Force FaceTime plot bandaid.
  • Giving the galaxy a feeling of distance and time passing.
  • Evening up the First Order and the Resistance.
  • Removing some of the total bullshit in the original version such as Mary Poppins Leia, inexplicably slow bombers, gravity bombs in space, Holdo reinventing interstellar warfare through suicide, military commanders who can’t command, misplaced comedy.

Of course, we have probably created our own glaring issues and problems.  That’s what rewrites are for!  On the subject of which, over to you guys.  Have at it, you magnificent bastards!