Gossip Girl was an amazing show. Within ten minutes of starting an episode, you began to think that maybe Bin Laden was on to something. If you completed an instalment then you would shortly be en route to the airport for a flight to the Middle East, ISIS application in hand, screaming “Death To The Infidels!”

Gossip-Girl

Even the goodwill generated by giving the world Blake Lively and Leighton Meester wasn’t enough to earn it forgiveness. It was, in one package, a perfect encapsulation of just about everything starting to go horribly wrong in Western culture. The vapid, Ralph Lauren clad clothes horses somehow earned six seasons and then, mercifully, it was over.

Then, as a demonstration of why we can’t have nice things, HBO Max inexplicably brought it back with a new generation of vacant Gen-Z faces on sticks to torment us simply by existing. However, a new age of enlightenment could be about to dawn on the world as HBO Max has cancelled this reboot after just two seasons.

They won’t order a third and the finale on January 26th will now end the whole thing.

The new, rebooted crime against humanity that was Gossip Girl was still based on the bestselling novels by Cecily von Ziegesar. Original series producers Stephanie Savage and Josh Schwartz managed to dodge a trial at the Haag to produce the reboot, too. HBO Max said in a statement:

“We are very grateful to showrunner/executive producer Joshua Safran, and executive producers Stephanie Savage and Josh Schwartz for bringing us back to the Upper East Side and all the scandals at Constance Billard. Although we are not moving forward with a third season of Gossip Girl, we thank them for the enticing love triangles, calculated backstabbing and impeccable fashion this series brought to a new audience.”

Now this is dead, they must turn their death ray on Sex and the City and then maybe the West will have a fighting chance.

Now get off my lawn!

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