OK, lots of Star Trek news from Comic-Con, including William Shatner, two new shows, Star Trek 4, Lower Decks, Deep Space 9, the Enterprise-E and other titbits. So let’s boldly go where no man wants to go and start with Picard Season 3. 

Picard 3 Facepalm

Picard Season 3

For some utterly unknown reason, Picard is getting a third season. This show stinks and the only thing it has managed to accomplish is show us that Patrick Stewart is the Mark Hamill of the Star Trek Universe. He sold us out folks, plain and simple.

Season One has an RT score of Critics (shills) 86% and Audiences 40%. Season Two is even worse with Critics giving it 85% and the Audience a generous 26%. And yet we are getting a third season. Talk about failing upwards. 

Well, in their desperation to win favour and go out on a high, Kurtzman and his clueless lackeys are bringing back the entire Next Generation cast to support the ailing shell of his former self, Jean-Luc Picard.

A brief teaser and some character posters gives us our first looks at the returning Geordi, Beverly Crusher, Worf, Riker, and Troi. Obviously Data is dead but I’m sure they will shoehorn him in to allow Spiner to ham it up once again. 

As well as the original crew, we will sadly be getting lesbian Seven and her utterly incompetent lover, Raffi. A woman who has the emotional stability of a toddler going through the terrible twos. 

Picard 3 cast
From top left to right: No thanks, no thanks, no thanks, no thanks, no thanks, no thanks, no thanks and no thanks.

Without going on a rant and introducing my American chums to some of the UK’s finest urban dictionary curse words, I’ll just say that I’d rather chew off my own nipples than watch Kurtzman and Stewart desecrate even more characters from TNG.

Live Action Lower Decks 

Star Trek: Lower Decks will be crossing over from animation to live-action, courtesy of a cross-over event with Star Trek: Strange New Worlds.

Jack Quaid of The Boys fame, and who I recently learned was the son of Dennis Quaid and Meg Ryan (I hope he didn’t inherit his mum’s 10 to 2 walk), took to the Comic-Con stage to announce that the crossover will happen in season 2 of Strange New Worlds

Quaid’s character will board the U.S.S. Enterprise and the episode will feature live-action and animation… wait, what!? Yep, apparently Quaid’s Ensign Brad Boimler will be featured in both live-action and animated segments. Jonathan Frakes will be directing the episode.

I’ve mostly enjoyed Strange New Worlds, even though there are glaring inconsistencies with Star Trek lore, but introducing some animation just seems ridiculous. What is this, Roger Rabbit In Space?

Star Trek Quaid
Dude on the far right by the Comic-Con logo looks like his career is flashing before his eyes.

Enterprise-E And More

Going back to Picard Season 3 (like some kind of abused spouse), one tiny snippet of information that is of minor interest is the appearance of the Enterprise-E.

During their segment, Patrick Stewart, Gates McFadden, Star Trek Killer Kurtzman and Rod Roddenberry appeared and provided some insight on what’s to come. They confirmed that not only will the Enterprise-E be seen in the new season, there will be more than one Enterprise. When asked if he sits in the Enterprise’s captain’s chair, Steward whispered:

“There’s more than one Enterprise and that makes it a little complicated, but we do return to the original Enterprise for a while.”

When he says “original Enterprise” I’m presuming he’s not talking about Kirk’s but about TNG’s original. Picard Season 2 confirmed that the saucer from the Enterprise-D (which crashed in Star Trek: Generations) was brought back to Earth for a museum display, so that could be used as a Memberberry moment. Who knows at this stage?

Star Trek Enterprise E
USS Enterprise NCC-1701-E last seen in Star Trek Nemesis.

Two More Shows

TrekMovie reports that it’s official, Star Trek is getting two more new shows. God help us.

Executive Producer Alex Kurtzman resided over the sub-panels for Picard, Lower Decksand Strange New Worlds at Comic-Con this past weekend, reminiscent of a vulture waiting for its prey to die before before feasting on its corpse.

Anyway, during a fan Q+A, a deaf fan (via an interpreter) asked Alex if a deaf actor would enter the Star Trek universe, following the casting of blind actor Bruce Horak in Strange New Worldsto which Kurtzman replied:

“It’s a terrific idea and it’s definitely something that we’ll take into the next two Star Trek shows that we are currently developing.”

As well as confirming that there will be two new shows, Kurtzman also hinted at the possibility of female leads in the new projects:

“You can certainly expect to see more Star Trek shows with female leads.”

Oh goodie! We don’t know if one of these new shows will be a spin-off series focusing on Michelle Yeoh’s character, Emperor Philippa Georgiou from the odious Star Trek Discovery, or something entirely new for him to use to shit all over Gene Roddenberry’s vision. Only time will tell.

No this is not a Flash Gordon.

DS9 Is Back

OK, that was a lie to make you keep reading but it is back, kind of. You see, the Lower Decks Season 3 trailer revealed a return to Deep Space Nine

I’ve not watch Lower Decks but according to the sources that I have borrowed from (wink, wink), the show follows the support crew of the U.S.S. Cerritos on their “comical” adventures through space in the “comedy” animated series.

In the trailer released at Comic-Con, a bunch of characters are seen fighting a number of monsters and exploring several otherworldly locations. They are on the hunt to save Captain Freeman following her untimely arrest at the end of season 2. We then get to see the U.S.S. Cerritos circling Deep Space Nine.

Whether we get to see a cartoon Sisko, Nerys, Bashir or even Quark is not known at this stage. Under Kurtzman’s guidance they should rebrand the entire thing Star Trek: Memberberries because apart from woke propaganda, it’s nothing more than that. Here’s the trailer, if you give a shit:

Star Trek Fans Want MacFarlane To Replace Kurtzman

To say that genuine Star Trek fans are appalled at modern day Star Trek is an understatement of gargantuan proportions. So much so that some fans have started a petition to get The Orville‘s creator Seth MacFarlane to replace current show runner Alex Kurtzman. The petition says:

“Alex Kurtzman has little respect for the wealth of information and progress that the ‘Star Trek’ universe has built up over more than 50 years.

He repeatedly ignores what the fans want to see for ‘Star Trek.’ Seth MacFarlane, on the other hand, is a lifelong Trekker who has shown that he can create a compelling story that respectfully and meaningfully looks at some of the problems ailing our modern world.

His work on the Orville is a testament to his creative genius and respect for fans.”

I couldn’t agree more. The Orville is absolutely excellent and more Star Trek than Star Trek. If you haven’t seen it yet and you are a Star Trek fan, finish this article and go watch it!

I’ve signed the petition and I urge you too: Make Seth MacFarlane Star Trek Showrunner

The Orville

Star Trek 4

Still here? Good because I’ve save the two best for last.

Way back in February it was reported that Star Trek 4 was a go. A script was being written by Josh Friedman (Snowpiercer) and Cameron Squires (WandaVision) and negotiations with the cast were under way. However, just a week later it turned out this was news to the cast too.

Well not anymore because Chris Pine has given us an update on Star Trek (Kelvin-Timeline) 4 by telling us that… he still doesn’t know what is going. Awesome.

Shatner Shits All Over Modern Star Trek

And finally, the pièce de résistance to this long-arsed article. William Shatner, the man, the legend, the best captain of the entire franchise has come out and said that Gene Roddenberry would be spinning in his grave at modern Star Trek.

Star Trek Ovation

Having appeared on the Masters of the Universe 40th Anniversary panel to announce his involvement in Kevin Smith’s latest pile of crap (yeah, none of us could even be bothered to write about it), the Shat had an hour-long conversation and Q&A about his career. Here he shared his thoughts on Kurtzman’s Star Trek.

Never one to mince his words, Bill was asked if he believes any of the recent Star Trek series have rivalled the original series he was part of. He simply replied:

“None of them.” 

He then gave his opinion on what Star Trek creator Gene Roddenberry would think of the franchise in its current form. Bill told a fan:

“I got to know Gene Roddenberry in three years fairly well. He’d be turning in his grave at some of this stuff.”

Bravo Mr Shatner, bravo.

Star Trek Shatner
William Shatner, a 91 year old Alpha.

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