Christmas may be a time of peace on Earth and goodwill to all men. It is also a time of sin! Stinking, corrupting, soul-staining sin! Look at you all, sitting there with your families, sinning away.
That extra helping of turkey – a sin. That fifteenth egg-nog to take the edge off your sister-in-law’s voice – a sin. Questioning why you ever had kids, and how much better this Christmas would be without them, on a tropical beach drinking cocktails – a sin! You should all be ashamed of yourselves.
So on this most special of days it falls to me, the most reverend Reverend and the humble earth-bound vessel of the Goddess Gal Gadot to once more prepare you for her judgment in The Last Movie Outpost Confession Booth. Judgment is at hand!
Also, we thought you might be bored on Christmas Day and want a distraction.
So today you must confess your retention of obscure movie facts. Call yourself a geek? Then you have a head full of trivia that affects your judgment and drives you to sin. Confession is good for the soul, and will help you unload.
What is the most obscure bit of movie trivia that you know?
Nobody should have to carry that burden. Enjoy the sweet release while your fellow Outposters look on, gasping in admiration at your sheer wickedness. Let he who is without sin cast the first stone. Even I, the most reverend Reverend, has sinned. Sometimes I feel close to sinning when I consider the Goddess. And speaking of beauty, consider this beauty of movie trivia:
In the 1967 James Bond movie You Only Live Twice, the henchman Sean Connery fights in the office at Osato Chemicals is played by Samoan-American wrestler Peter Fanene Maivia, who was also the grandfather of Dwayne ‘The Rock’ Johnson.
My soul is prepared. Is yours? Do not sin as you sit there with your families, bored out of your mind and forced to watch The Gruffallo with your children. Instead join us here in an orgy of soul cleansing and confess. CONFESS!